Today I kind of can’t stand being around my kids. That is a terrible thing to say. But you know what’s even worse than saying it? Feeling it.
Seriously, though. I feel like I’m about to lose my ever-loving MIND. I could try to explain it… how Isaiah cries and carries on about absolutely EVERYTHING (oh wait, I’ve already done that), including but not limited to weeping because Gryffin is standing too close to him and Gryffin said he’s not going to invite him to his birthday party and I want a different blankie and I’m sad because my toe has a ouchie. Honestly. Crocodile tears and the whole nine yards. Gryffin’s birthday is, like, 4 months from now, the ouchie is more than 3 weeks old and barely noticeable, I’ve offered every blankie in the entire house and OHMYWORD.
I’ve heard that you aren’t supposed to try to reason with a 3-year-old. They are too young, they are incapable of it, they lack the cognitive ability and blah blah blah. But it’s a lot easier said than done. Why can’t he just pull himself together and act like a grown up for once in his life?
Gryffin, on the other hand, is like Jekyll and Hyde. Sometimes he is so adorable and dear that I wish I could just run away with him and never come back; just me and my boy and his adorable questions and sweet thought-processing — it’s almost unbearable. But then something imperceptible (to me, anyway) causes him to make an abrupt about-face and suddenly he’s sullen and whining and whimpering for no apparent reason.
Nap time has been intolerable this week. Fighting and crying and carrying on and I’m about to gauge.my.own.eyes.out. And you know what the problem is? I can’t just walk away from them. I can’t leave my house in a huff like I want to. Like I would do to ANY OTHER HUMAN who was acting that way. I have to stay here and just stomp about like a beast, shutting the refrigerator door just a little too hard, sighing audibly at every turn so the boys will know how annoyed I am, and counting down the minutes until bedtime.
You know what’s funny, though? Tomorrow I might be singing their praises from the rooftops. Heck, give it an hour and I might be writing a completely different post. Because on top of being completely unreasonable and annoying, they are fickle creatures. Happy one minute and utterly despondent the next. One day, one hour, we’re soaring to unbelievable heights of joy and happiness and the next I’m so frustrated I almost break the breakfast dishes. It’s hard to keep up sometimes. I love my boys crazy much. You know that. But right now? UGGGGHHHH.